Flavor texts add life to Magic: The Gathering cards; they make them more than just art on a cardboard by sharing a taste of the game’s lore, a clever quote from a character, details of Magic’s various worlds, or a funny line to give us comic relief in the heat of a competitive strategy game. A few years ago, I wrote the Top 54 Funniest Magic: The Gathering Flavor Texts on Epicstream.com, and now, I’ve compiled the best flavor texts from Modern Horizons 2.
Some of these quotes are just simple truths, or just pure comic relief while others are packed with meaning and inspiration. I’ve ranked the 15 best ones in this list. Although the first 15 cards may be loosely ranked, the Top 5 flavor texts here are some of the best Wizards of the Coast ever published.
15 Modern Horizons 2 cards with the best flavor texts
15. Sylvan Anthem
The harsher the winter, the more glorious the spring
I’m starting this list off with a simple yet meaningful quote, and the timing of Modern Horizon 2’s preview season is perfect for this as the last winter’s Kaldheim release was pretty harsh with a bunch of cards with snow mechanics. Yavimaya is all about nature, and this spring is definitely more glorious with the release of Sylvan Anthem, one of the Modern Horizons 2 cards that are considered to be powerful. Even Magic head designer Mark Rosewater wanted to tweak it.
14. Phantasmal Dreadmaw
“That was perhaps the most terrifying thing I though I almost saw”
The blue version of Colossal Dreadmaw has arrived, and just like the meme Dinosaur card that’s been printed multiple times within a few years, Phantasmal Dreadmaw packs a spicy flavor text: a quote from Captain Lannery Storm. It’s just perfect for this huge Dinosaur Illusion card.
13. Young Necromancer
“Who needs imaginary friends when you’ve got dead ones?”
Young Necromancer’s flavor text is witty and perfect for her childlike character. At least dead ones are real, right?
12. Patchwork Gnomes
One wizard’s trash is another wizard’s roving gang of abominations.
Even one of Modern Horizons 2’s “trash cards” can feature a clever flavor text, and Patchwork Gnomes is loaded with flavor.
11. Jewel-Eyed Cobra
“Sure, they’re worth a lot, but I’d rather survive to spend my earnings.”
—Mokgar, Kalonian hunter
Here’s another card with a meaningful flavor text that perfectly describes the creature and its abilities. It makes you question: How would you enjoy your wealth if the cost of acquiring it could be your life?
10. Zuran Orb
Zuran Orb is back again with new art by Ryan Pancoast, and a new flavor text that will really make you think. It tells so much about Zur’s character in just a couple of sentences.
“Obsession is Zur’s one flaw as a magic user. His total preoccupation with immortality has become an affliction for his otherwise brilliant mind.”
—Jodah, Archmage Eternal
9. Fractured Sanity
The body grows stronger under stress. The mind does not.
Here’s another flavor text that simply speaks the truth, but you can argue that a mind can still grow stronger under mental challenges like puzzles. Otherwise, it can just fracture your sanity.
8. Lens Flare
The key for surviving a war is never becoming its focus.
This flavor text sounds like a quote taken from Sun Tzu’s The Art of War.
7. Diamond Lion
“The merchant asked for riches no one had ever dreamed of. The djinn, smiling, granted his wish.”
No one probably have ever dreamed of a creature version of Lion’s Eye Diamond, but here it is. The message here is similar to Jewel-Eyed Cobra: the path to wealth could be a dangerous one.
One day, it might provide a flash of insight that turns the tide of battle. Meanwhile, it looks lovely on an end table.
It’s rare to see an MTG flavor text about aesthetic vs. functionality, and this quote says it well.
5. Fodder Tosser
“In event of siege, load copiously with: hot oil, cannonballs, caltrops, rubble, old swords, mess-hall leftovers, chamber pots, broken chairs, salt, cousin Furt …”
Poor cousin Furt! The tone of this flavor text reminds me of those hilarious flavor texts from the old goblin cards. The random descriptions here have a lot of flavor, and that’s why I’m ranking this high.
4. Discerning Taste
“Everyone loves a dash of crushed pixie … except the pixie.”
A dash of crushed pixie sounds pretty delicious, but it sounds kind of brutal when you think about it since pixies are fragile little innocent creatures.
3. Angelic Curator
“Do not treat your people as you treat your artifacts. Let them go, and they will live; seal them here, and they will die.”
—Urza, to Radiant
Just a meaningful and well-written quote that even non-Magic players would appreciate. This uncommon card from Modern Horizons 2 may not be as flashy or powerful as other cards in the set, but it definitely features one of the best flavor texts ever printed in a Magic card.
2. Ornithopter of Paradise
“Through even our darkest days, we must never cease creating. Each new invention brings value to the world, be it beauty, utility, or both.”
Need an inspiring quote to motivate you to grind throughout the day? Ornithopter of Paradise got you! As a content creator myself, I find this quote powerful.
- Hunting Pack
There is no “I” in “team”, but there is definitely “meat”.
Get it? “Meat” is the anagram of “team”. This flavor text is just perfect for one of the best cards in the Red/Green Storm archetype. A team of beast creatures could definitely work together to find meat, and this clever quote is a big win.
Which Modern Horizons 2 card do you think has the best flavor text? Feel free to share your opinions in the comments section below.